Prussia X Reader- That Which Divides Us Part 4 END

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or you…Or One Piece…Or a car of my own…Or a house of my own…Or a dog… (Goes to corner of woe over all the things I don't own).

Stare…All you could do was stare at it.

After crying yourself the sleep the night before, you awoke to the oddest sight outside your window. Not believing what you were seeing, you walked out of the house, not even bothering to change out of your nightgown. As you got closer and closer, you realized you weren't seeing things…

There were a bunch of concrete posts set up in a line, seeming to go on forever in either direction. Between these posts was barbed wire.

…There was a wall between East and West Berlin…

"Is this supposed to be a prank?" you asked yourself as other Berliners woke up and gathered to gaze at the structure from either side of it.

"I doubt that."

You turned around and spotted Ludwig walking towards you with Lovino and Feliciana in tow. They were all troubled by the structure as you were.

"So, what the hell is this supposed to be?" Lovino asked.

"There're some guards on the other side," Feliciana said groggily, "Ask them."

As you stepped forward to do just that, a man came running to the crowd on your side of the wall.

"Hey!" he yelled loud enough for everyone to hear, "The telephone wires connecting us to East Berlin have been cut!"

A murmur went through the crowds on the east and west side. Some from both sides gathered to courage to shout questions at the guards standing by the wall.

"Why were the lines cut?!"

"Hey, what's the purpose of this thing?"

"My son is visiting his grandparents in West Berlin! How will he get back?"

"What're you people up to?"

Finally, one of the guards raised his gun, effectively silencing people on both sides. He cleared his throat before speaking up.

"This is an order!" the guard shouted, "As of this moment forth, all free travel between East and West Berlin is forbidden. Unless you are a government official or have obtained special permission, no one can cross this wall!"

The guard's words ignited roars of outrage from the people.

"You can't do that!" a man yelled.

"I'm only here to see a friend!" a woman shouted, "I was supposed to go back to East Berlin tomorrow!"

"We can't even call anyone on the other side anymore?!" another person yelled in disbelief, "How will we speak with our family and friends?"

You, Ludwig, Feliciana and Lovino had remained quiet all this time. The four of you stared at the wall with horror. Feliciana put a hand over her mouth while Lovino grit his teeth. Ludwig was shaking really badly.

Your breathing had slowed down considerably. Your eyes were wide. There were noises all around you but none of them were registering. Only one thought went through your head upon hearing the guard's words.

Gilbert…Gilbert…Gilbert is over there!

You made your way over to the wall. You spotted a guard through the barbed wire, eyeing you closely. You got as close as you could.

"This wall," you said, trying to keep your voice even, "This is only temporary, right? It…It will come down in a few days or so, right?"

"I don't know," the guard said with a weary sigh, "I was just told to make sure no one got through, okay?"

This can't be happening…you thought as you made your way back to your friends. This is temporary. They'll take it down soon…They have to!

You saw that the others looked deeply troubled, having overheard what the guard had told you.

"C'mon, you three," you said, trying to make your voice as bright as possible, "They can't cut an entire city in half forever! This thing will be taken down soon, you'll see!"

"But, ____," Feliciana said softly, "What if it doesn't get taken down? Gilbert is-"

"He said he'd come back," you interrupted firmly, "And he will! So let's not worry too much."

******

You quietly ate breakfast at the table with your parents and Ludwig. After asking where the two of you had disappeared to before, you told them about the wall. Once they had returned home after confirming your story, the four of you ate in an uneasy silence.

"…So that's what they meant," your father said after a while, "There had been rumors going around that something was going to be done to tighten the border…"

"But to do it so quickly," your mother said in shock, "It's terrifying…"

"Well, at least we live in the western part of the city," your father added, "So, we'll be fine."

"…But what about Gilbert?" you asked lowly.

Your parents tensed at his name. You saw Ludwig giving you a warning glance, which you ignored.

"What have I said about using his name in this house?" your father asked darkly.

"You sent him over there," you continued in a quiet tone, "Even with all the rumors spreading about East Germany, you still sent him there. And now there's a wall keeping him away."

"Good riddance to bad trash," your father answered, "At least we won't have to worry about him sneaking over here-"

You slammed the cup you had been drinking out of on the table. While your mother scolded you about your bad manners, you quickly left the table and ran upstairs into your room.

You fell back on your bed, muttering curse after curse under your breath. A chirp shook you from your thoughts.

"Gilbird," you said.

After Gilbert had left, you had brought Gilbird's cage into your own room. The bird had let out soothing chirps and twitters as you cried and cried the night before.

You reached into the cage and took the bird in your hand. You pet his soft head gently while he looked up at you.

"I'm sorry, Gilbird," you whispered, "Mutti is just a little upset right now…"

Gilbird jumped around in your palm, turning this way and that, as though he were searching for something…You knew exactly what it was…

"Vati isn't here," you explained as you nuzzled your nose against his soft feathers, "He…He had to go away for a while…But he will come back. He said he would…"

As you felt tears start to form, you placed your hand against your beloved necklace. You closed your eyes and remembered…His promise to take you to America…His promise to marry you…

He would…Gilbert would definitely return…

******

Several days later, it happened just as you had said. The barbed wire wall had been removed…

Only for a bigger barrier to take its place.

You clenched your fists as the new and improved wall was set up. It was sturdier, being made out of concrete blocks, and was topped by barbed wire.

"It's like they're caging us in," Lovino said as he stared at the new wall with you, "I hear this thing will completely cut off our half of Berlin from all of East Germany."

You wrapped your arms around yourself. It had been about two weeks since Gilbert had left. You wondered if he was aware of the wall. If he was being treated right by your father's friend. If he was eating properly.

"____," Lovino said, "Did you hear what I said?"

"Huh?" you replied, "I-I'm sorry, Lovino…I was just…"

You let out a sigh. Lovino put an arm around your shoulders and pulled you close.

"He's stubborn, that potato sucker," he said, "The second he sees this thing, he'll be thinking up a hundred ways to get past it. Nothing will stop him from getting back to you, ____."

You felt a smile form on your face and you embraced Lovino tightly.

"Danke…"

******

Days passed since the new version of the wall, which was becoming known as the Berlin Wall, had been erected. Days turned into weeks…Weeks into months…

You made a trip to the Wall every single day. You didn't know why. It's not like you had any contact with Gilbert or could see past the concrete structure. Plus, the buildings that had been closest to the Wall had their windows boarded up following several rather daring escape attempts from the East Berliners, so it wasn't like you could look over the barrier either…

"Hey, you there!"

You flinched when you saw a guard, a man of about forty, marching towards you.

"I'm sorry," you said quickly, "I was-"

"Calm down, Fraulein," the man said gently, "I'm not going to bite…You're the one who keeps coming here every day, right?"

You nodded, wondering how the guard knew that. As if he read your thoughts, he answered.

"I overheard some of the other guards talking about a young woman who keeps showing up here. The description matches yours…Oh, where are my manners? I'm Friedrich Bach."

You gave your name and shook hands with the guard. You eased up upon seeing how friendly he was.

"So, what brings you here, Fraulein ____?" he asked, "……You have someone on the other side, don't you?"

"…My fiancé," you answered.

"I'm sorry…"

"No, don't be!" you replied, "I've known him for so long. He's tough and he won't let something as stupid as a giant wall keep him from getting over here!"

You clapped your hand over your mouth as the words came out. You only just realized that you had made it sound like you knew of an escape attempt. You had heard the stories of guards shooting at escapees and had heard gunfire several times to corroborate the claims.

"Don't panic!" Herr Bach said with a laugh, "It's not like we care if someone tries to come over, legally or illegally."

You were puzzled. Why wouldn't they care? Wasn't it their job to prevent people from crossing the Wall at all costs? You asked him such, only to receive a chuckle in return.

"It's those guys in East Berlin you've been hearing about, Fraulein! They're the ones shooting up people. And that's also where the escapees are coming from. I'll be damned if I see someone from our side going over there…"

"But, isn't it still your job to capture those who cross without permission?" you asked.

"Well, sure," he said slyly, "But, it's not our fault if we just happen to drop our weapons and take an agonizingly long time to pick them up…Or if we just happen to trip…Or if our backs just happen to be turned as someone crosses…"

You let out a small giggle. So that's how it was…

******

Christmas arrived…The first Christmas you would be spending without Gilbert in many years…

Lovino, Feliciana and their parents had arrived at your house, as they do every year, bringing along their exceptionally delicious homemade pasta.

"It's so yummy because of those tomatoes you grew, Fratello!" Feliciana beamed.

"D-d-don't say that!" Lovino grumbled, a blush on his cheeks.

Your parents greeted the Vargas kids coldly, still bitter over them having known of your relationship with Gilbert. Instead, they talked only with Feliciana and Lovino's parents the whole night.

After dinner, while your parents drank with Herr and Frau Vargas, you and your friends sat on the floor to open up presents. Lovino took care to sit directly between Ludwig and Feliciana.

"Lovino, it's Christmas!" you said, "Can't you let it go for just one day?"

"I told you, not anytime soon!" Lovino replied.

The four of you went through the presents rather quickly, making small comments and giving thanks. You knew it just was not the same without Gilbert around, exclaiming over every little thing as though it was the greatest present in the world.

You opened a small box from your parents, revealing a gold chain. You looked up at them.

"Isn't it beautiful, ____?" your mother asked with a smile, "It'll look so much better on you than the one you always wear. Isn't it old?"

You frowned before shutting the box and putting it to the side, not looking at it again.

"Oh!" you said suddenly, leaning in to whisper, "Guys, distract my parents for me. I'm going there."

"____, should you really be going to the Wall so much?" Ludwig asked worriedly, "You might drive yourself insane if you keep this up."

"I'll be fine, Ludwig!" you said, "Just cover for me!"

The three of them agreed and proceeded to talk animatedly about things and block your parents' view as you ran into the kitchen. From a jar you had hidden on a high shelf, you grabbed two small packages, one blue and one red with a note attached. You quickly put on your coat and slipped out of the house.

******

After several minutes, you arrived at the Wall and spotted Herr Bach walking alongside it.

"Merry Christmas, Herr Bach!" you called as you approached the guard whom you had befriended. You gave him the blue package, "These are some cookies I made with Feliciana! They're really good!"

"Danke, Fraulein ____," he said, "I feel bad I have nothing for you."

"Actually, if you could do me this one favor, that can be my gift," you said, offering the red package with the note, "You said you were going over on the east side later, right? You remember what I told you about Gilbert, don't you?"

"Well," you continued when he nodded, "Could…Could you give this to him if you see him?"

The smile on Herr Bach's face went away.

"Fraulein," he said seriously, "You know the chances of me seeing him-"

"I know!" you exclaimed, "Keep the cookies if you don't find him! But…If you don't see him, please leave the note somewhere there…At least then he'd have a chance of finding it…"

After Herr Bach gave you his word he would do his best to get the present to Gilbert, you made your way back home. You pulled out your necklace and played with the ship charm.

"One day…" you whispered.

"Mutti! Look, it's her! The girl with the ship necklace!"

You paused and saw a girl of about ten pointing at you, tugging on her mother's arm. You recognized the pair as being escapees from the east who arrived two days earlier.

The mother widened her eyes when she saw her daughter was correct and came up to you.

"You…" she said, "You're ____, aren't you?"

"I am," you said cautiously.

"And you know a man on the other side of the Wall, right? White hair, red eyes? His name's Gilbert Beilschmidt?"

You nodded frantically, wondering what this woman was getting at. You saw her reach into her coat pocket and hand you a small, crudely wrapped package and a piece of paper.

"Merry Christmas!" she said with a smile as she and her daughter walked away quickly.

You watched them walk away for a minute before looking over the piece of paper.

It was a letter…It was crinkled and faded in some spots. There was no name on it, probably to prevent the letter from being traced to anyone.

But the handwriting was instantly recognizable.

Hey, liebling! Merry Christmas from the awesome me! I sent this with these ladies and told them to give it to you on Christmas. I hope it worked out.

Were you worried when you saw the wall? I'd be lying if I said I wasn't. This complicates things, right? No worries! I said I'd come back and I will! It just may take a little longer.

I'm eating alright. The guy I'm staying with is tough but not as bad Onkel. The factory is a hard place to work, but I'm doing fine. I'm not earning anything near what I was paid before but I can live.

About the package…I'd be lying if I said I bought it for you. I can't afford to. I found it and thought you would like it.

I hope my bruder is doing well. And that girlfriend of his better be watching out for him! As for that Tomato Brat, tell him that he'd better stop wrecking things between them like I know he's doing! He'd better get used to the idea of being my bruder-in-law one day!

Ich liebe dich…

Your hands shook and tears cascaded down your face. You gently pressed the letter against your lips before folding it carefully and pocketing it. You then turned your attention to the package. You unwrapped it slowly.

As the small object tumbled into your hand, you let out a small laugh that turned into a cry.

…A tiny wood ship…

******

It was August of 1962, just over a year since the wall was put in place…Over a year since you last saw Gilbert. You kept the letter from him and the little ship tucked away in your drawer, hidden under your clothes. You had secretly let Ludwig, Lovino and Feliciana know about them the day after Christmas. You all laughed, glad that Gilbert was fine.

You were especially glad when you saw Herr Bach again a few days after Christmas. He smiled as he told you about a loud, arrogant young man he happened to run into while he was in East Berlin, who enjoyed those homemade cookies. You didn't care who stared as you hugged Herr Bach tightly and let out a loud scream of joy.

"Guten tag, Herr Bach!" you called cheerfully as you arrived at the Wall on August 17th.

"Nice to see you again, Fraulein ____!" Herr Bach said in return.

The two of you chatted as you usually did when you came to the Wall. It helped to ease the worry in your mind.

"I wonder will Gilbert will come back," you said as you stared at the barrier.

"Have faith, Fraulein," Herr Bach said, "That man seemed adamant about getting back to you."

You laughed at that. Yes…One day soon, you'll be holding Gilbert again. And the two of you will get married. You wondered if Gilbert would be alright if you made both Ludwig and Lovino his best men.

"STOP!" a loud yell sounded from the other side of the Wall.

You snapped your eyes up to the top of the Wall and saw, to your shock, a young man, maybe in his late teens, appear. You saw that the barbed wire was cutting into him but he withstood the pain long enough to drop onto the west side.

Herr Bach raced over to the man, along with several other witnesses. As the tended to him, you heard gunfire from the east side of the Wall and a yell of pain.

"PETER!" the injured man yelled in horror.

You were shaking when you saw another young man appear at the top of the Wall. He was covered in blood and wincing from pain. He had been hit who knows how many times by the bullets. The West Berliners yelled at the boy, encouraging him to go on just a little further.

You let out a small shriek as he fell…Back into East Berlin…

"Fraulein ____!" Herr Bach yelled to you, "Leave here! Hurry!"

You stared from Herr Bach, to the injured man who was calling for his friend, to the Wall. You heard the boy who fell crying from pain…

You ran away…

Peter Fechter, you later learned his name was…The fiftieth person to fall victim to the Berlin Wall…

******

"____...Hey, ____!"

You moaned lightly as you tried to go back to sleep.

"C'mon, ____! You're not that deep a sleeper!"

With a groan you opened one eye to see who felt it necessary to wake you up in the middle of the night.

You saw crimson…

"Wahhh!" you gasped as you scrambled back.

"Kesesesese! What kind of reaction was that? I thought you'd be happy!"

You sat up slowly and took a better look at the owner of the voice. That white hair, those crimson eyes…That laugh…That smile…

"G-Gil…" you stuttered, "Gilbert!"

It was him…Gilbert…He smiled broadly.

With an exhilarated laugh, you launched yourself at him…

…Only to land on the floor with a thud.

"Ow…" you said as you got up, rubbing your throbbing shoulder. You turned to look at Gilbert, "…Why…?"

"You know why…" Gilbert replied sadly.

"……………This is a dream?"

"Close…I'd say it's a hallucination actually."

You put your head in your hands.

"Mein Gott," you whispered, "I've gone insane…"

"Not just yet!" Gilbert said, "If you think you're insane, you're not really insane. It's when you start accepting the hallucinations as reality that you have to worry."

You looked up at Gilbert…the hallucination…No, Gilbert. He looked just as he did when he left last year.

"This is too cruel…" you said, "Why am I imagining you?"

"Probably because of what happened to that Peter boy," Gilbert said.

You shuddered, replaying the scene from earlier in the day. Those cries of agony. The blood. The gunfire…

"They didn't help him…" you whispered angrily, "They left him there to die…"

"It's happened before, ____," Gilbert said, "It'll probably happen again…"

He looked at you when you didn't respond. You were staring at him, as though you were in a trance.

"____?" he asked.

"I haven't heard your voice in so long…" you said, "It's just my imagination but it's like it's actually you here."

"Of course!" Gilbert laughed, "I'd be surprised if you couldn't think up an accurate hallucination of me. We've been together for fifteen years."

You sat on your bed while Gilbert sat down next to you. The two of you began talking about ordinary things. Ludwig, Lovino, Feliciana, Gilbird…Your parents…Your life…The Christmas presents you gave each other.

"Well, you're tired," Gilbert said, "So, I'd better get going."

"You'll come back, right?" you asked.

Gilbert gave you a pained expression.

"____," he said, "I'd be happier if you didn't call be back…"

The next morning, Ludwig had asked you why he had heard you talking with someone late last night. You said it was just a dream…

******

June 26th, 1963…

It had been nearly two years since the Berlin Wall went up. Herr Bach hadn't gone over to East Berlin last Christmas and no one came up to you with a letter from Gilbert…

You stood in the crowd that had gathered to listen to the speech that was being given to West Berliners by the American President, John F. Kennedy.

He talked about the failures of communism and how, no matter how troublesome freedom and democracy became, how they never had to build a wall to keep people in. You joined in the ecstatic cheers of the audience.

"Ich bin ein Berliner," President Kennedy said, causing the crowd to erupt in applause.

"Kesesesese! Did he just call himself a pastry?!"

You rolled your eyes as you turned towards Gilbert, who was snickering about the president's slightly inaccurate German.

"Gilbert, don't be mean!" you scolded, ignoring the stares you were getting from others. After all, to them you were talking to air, "You know what he meant!"

Gilbert regarded the man.

"So, that's the President of the United States…" he said, "I wonder if he'll still be in charge when we go over there."

"It depends on when you come back…" you replied.

Gilbert gave you a look.

"I told you to stop calling me back, ____," he said.

"I didn't call you," you argued, "You just showed up."

"I wouldn't be showing up if you didn't want me to…Stop going to the Wall, ____. It's affecting you."

"You're just a worrywart!" you laughed, walking away from Gilbert, "I'll be fine!"

******

Just a few months later, in October, you wrapped up a bunch of cookies you had made with Feliciana and went to the Wall. You knew it was Herr Bach's birthday and he loved these cookies. You felt bad that you hadn't seen him in the past few days, but you had caught a bad cold and only just recovered.

As you approached the Wall, you were stopped by a guard…Someone you didn't recognize…

"Sorry, Fraulein," he said, "No one can come near here."

"Oh, I'm just here to see one of the guards," you said, looking down the Wall, "His name is Friedrich Bach."

You saw the guard's shoulder's droop and his expression become miserable.

"You're a friend of Friedrich's?" he asked.

You nodded slowly, a feeling of dread growing in the pit of your stomach.

"I don't know how to say this…" the guard said softly, "…But Friedrich died three days ago."

The cookies fell to the ground. Your jaw dropped slightly.

A joke…A cruel, heartless, utterly terrible joke…That's what it had to be! But no…The sorrow on the guard's face told you otherwise.

"…Why?" you asked.

The guard explained how, while Herr Bach was patrolling another end of the Wall, an East Berliner had attempted to cross by climbing the Wall. Usually when something like that happened, the guards stood by to tend to any injuries climbers received, usually from the barbed wire.

However, for some reason, Herr Bach climbed the Wall himself, stating he needed to get him over right away. However, as he grabbed the escapee, a guard on the east side shot at them.

The shot hit Herr Bach in the head and killed him instantly while the escapee he had tried to help fell back onto the east side…

The three shots that sounded afterwards told the other guards of the fate of the climber.

The East Berlin guards claimed that Herr Bach's death had been accidental, that they were aiming for the climber. Plus, they claimed Herr Bach was at fault for climbing the Wall in the first place to assist the escapee…The story was believed and no charges were pressed…

As the guard finished his story, you ran all the way home…

******

You sobbed into your pillow, as you had been doing for the past two hours.

How…? How could someone as kind as Herr Bach be killed so callously? For the first time since the Berlin Wall was built, you found yourself hating those who tried to escape to your side. It was irrational but you didn't care.

"____?"

You shot your head up and glared at Gilbert, who was looking at you sadly. You threw your pillow at him.

"Go away!" you screamed, "Go away! Go away! Scheiße, you're not even real!!!!"

Gilbert's face darkened at those words. He marched up to you and grabbed your arms. You yelled at him as he pinned you to the bed and knelt over you.

"I can touch you…" he said.

You stopped yelling long enough to glare at him, wondering what he was getting at. You heard someone banging your bedroom door, which you had locked and barricaded with one of your smaller dressers.

"I'm not real," he growled, "I'm just something your mind has made up…But I'm holding you!"

He tightened his grip on your arms, as if to prove his point, before going on.

"I'm pinning you down! I'm touching you right now! I may not be real, but you're making me real, ____!!!!"

He stared at you for a minute longer before releasing you. You sat up as he walked away.

"I told you to stop going to the Wall," he said, "So do it…Before I become even more real…"

******

The year 1965 brought with it beautiful weather and another version of the Wall…

This time it was one solid concrete wall, supported by steel girders. It was amazing how each version seemed even more intimidating than the last.

However, that was not on your mind for once…

You nearly dropped the glass you had been drinking out of in shock.

"You're getting married?!" you exclaimed, looking back and forth from Ludwig to Feliciana.

Feliciana beamed and hugged you happily while Ludwig was blushing lightly.

"I knew it would happen!" you said gleefully, "When's the date?"

"In December," Ludwig answered.

The three of you turned your attention towards Lovino, who was glaring at you all in anger. Perhaps Feliciana and Ludwig should have told you first and then slowly broke the news to him later.

"You're nineteen," Lovino said to Feliciana, "And he's only twenty. I can't believe you're already thinking of marriage."

"Fratello…" Feliciana said, wearing a rare frown, "You're always like this. Why can't you be happy for me?"

"How can I be happy when you're marrying this damn potato bastardo?!" he yelled.

"But Fratello, we want you to be Ludwig's best man!"

"Che palle! I can't believe this!"

"Lovino, it's been four years!" you said, "How can you still be against Ludwig?"

"I'd be against anyone who tried to marry my sorella!!!" he shouted.

You and Feliciana watched in shock as Lovino marched up to Ludwig and grabbed the front of his shirt, pulling him down to his eye level. Ludwig seemed a bit surprised by the uncharacteristic action but didn't say anything.

"So, you love Feliciana, huh?" Lovino asked, "You want to marry her?! ……………Then, don't you dare do anything to hurt her! Or I'll show you that I do have some bite behind my bark."

Lovino released Ludwig and pouted.

"So…" he grumbled, "What does a best man do?"

Feliciana squealed in delight and hugged Lovino tightly, much to his embarrassment. You walked over to Ludwig and pat him on the back.

"You got him to accept you, Ludwig," you said proudly, "Way to go…"

Ludwig smiled as he stared at the Vargas siblings.

"……____?" he began, "Do you…Do you think Bruder would be proud of me?"

You were thrown off by the question. Since Gilbert's departure, Ludwig had barely mentioned him. You were scared for some time that Ludwig had chosen to forget about Gilbert.

"…It's Gilbert," you said with a smile, "He's always been proud of you…And just wait until he hears about this!"

Ludwig grinned as he thought about that too.

******

"So, Ludwig is getting married, is he?"

You turned to your mother with a frown.

"The wedding is in December," you said casually.

"…And when do you plan to have your wedding, ____?" she asked.

You pulled out the ship charm on your chain.

"When Gilbert comes back," you said, just like always.

"Do not speak about him in front of me or your father!" she responded, "____, you are twenty four years old. Most of the girls you went to school with have already settled down and half of them have children already!"

"Well, good for them!" you said, trying to quell your anger.

"You always turn away the men your father and I bring over…"

"Because I've promised myself to someone else!"

"He won't come back, ____!"

"HE WILL!" you screamed, "He's the only one I will marry!"

With that, you went to your room before your mother could respond. You slammed the door hard.

"I can't believe she doesn't get it by now!" you yelled, "Her and Vati! Gilbird, can you-?"

You cut yourself off midsentence when you looked at the cage. You slowly walked towards it, your lower lip quivering.

There was Gilbird, lying at the bottom of the cage…He wasn't moving at all.

"Gilbird," you whispered as you took him out, petting him gently, "Gilbird…"

He had been healthy. You fed him, cleaned him, took care of his wing…Physically, he was in top shape for a bird.

But you knew what had killed him…

"…I miss him too," you whispered, holding the little bird close to you.

******

After returning from burying Gilbird, you took a bath, remembering to take off your necklace and leave it in a safe place. As you exited the bath and changed your clothes, you went to retrieve your necklace…

It wasn't there…

You turned your room inside out, searching every nook and cranny. But no…The silver chain with the charm in the shape of a ship…It wasn't there.

You ran downstairs, to where your parents were sitting and talking in the living room.

"WHERE IS IT???!!!!" you yelled at them furiously.

"Do not yell, ____," your father said, "Now, what are you-?"

"Shut up!" you screamed at him, "You know what I'm talking about! Where's my necklace?!"

"How dare you speak that way to me? Now, what necklace-?"

"The necklace Gilbert gave me!"

"Don't say his-"

"GILBERT!" you shouted, "Gilbert! Gilbert! Gilbert!"

Your father walked up to you and slapped you hard. You were stunned momentarily before resuming your yells.

"Give it back to me! It's my necklace! It's our promise!"

Your father grabbed you and dragged you back to your room. As he locked the door from the outside, you never once stopped screaming at him.

"I hate you! I hate you so much! Give it back to me!!! Give it back!"

Nothing…You turned around, pressing your back against the door. You stared and saw him…

Gilbert looked at you, a torn expression on his face. He hated to be back here…But he wanted to comfort you as well.

"They took it," you said, your voice cracking, "They won't give it back…"

Without a word, Gilbert walked up to you and held your face. You closed your eyes as he kissed you.

He wasn't real…Just a figment of your imagination. But you didn't care…

As his lips moved against yours, Gilbert, the hallucination…Whatever he was…He made you forget for just one moment…

******

It was the spring of 1970…

Lovino was gone…He had left after Feliciana and Ludwig's marriage.

It wasn't that he hated Germany. It wasn't that he hated the marriage either. It was just he knew that Germany was not where he belonged. The rest of you knew it too, which was why it didn't come as a surprise. So, after getting the special permission he needed, Lovino had set off to Italy.

You had all cried when he left, none as much as Feliciana. But he promised to come back one day. Traveling took some time, so it wouldn't be for a while. But he would definitely come back and see all of you again.

Feliciana and Ludwig had a baby now…A girl they named Juliane. She was adorable, with Ludwig's hair and Feliciana's eyes.

It was odd the day Ludwig moved out of the house. Sure, he now lived with his family in a house just down the street. But, his presence in your home was the only reminder you had of what things used to be like.

You walked through the streets, having visited the Wall yet again. You never stayed as long anymore, since Herr Bach wasn't around to talk with you.

You also never saw "Gilbert" anymore. You were twenty nine years old now…It felt odd to you to look at the twenty year old Gilbert who kept showing up.

"____?"

You looked up and saw a man approaching you. Dark hair and blue eyes…

"…Harald Acker…" you said.

"It is you!" he exclaimed, "I haven't seen you in so long! ……Something's different about you."

"Well, I've definitely aged in the past nine years…" you said.

"Not that…Oh! Where's your necklace? You always wore it whenever I saw you, it's odd seeing you without it."

"It's gone," you said quickly, placing a hand where it once was.

"I'm sorry, ____," Harald said, knowing how much that necklace meant to you.

"It was my own fault, honestly…I-"

"Vati, I'm tired!"

You looked down to see a blonde haired boy with Harald's eyes, pulling on Harald's leg.

"Oh, this is Cord," Harald explained, picking up the child, "He's three. Cord, this is an old friend of mine, ____."

Cord waved at you before resting his head against Harald's shoulder.

"So, you have a family now," you stated.

"Indeed I do…" Harald answered with a grin, "I love them very much."

"Well, I hope Gilbert hurries back soon," you said, looking back towards the Wall, "I would love my own family too."

Harald looked at you with sympathy. A young woman, his wife, called out to him…

"I better go," he said, "It was nice seeing you again, ____."

You waved farewell.

******

1976…

Work was being done to build yet another version of the Berlin Wall. You could tell, based on the construction that was already taking place, that this version would be the worst one yet.

Despite your mother's cries, you still didn't get married. You held out for Gilbert to return.

At least you didn't have your father yelling at you anymore, considering he had gotten ill and died the year before. You took care of him and cried for him…But you couldn't bring yourself to forgive him.

Not for what happened to Gilbert or for the necklace…

You may not have had your necklace anymore, but you still had the tiny wood ship and the letter he gave you on that first Christmas without him. The letter was hidden in a photo album, while the ship was in an old jewelry box you had.

You never did receive any word from him after that Christmas. Well, things must be hard. East Germany's economy was in shambles, the people were miserable…

He must be working hard…you thought. You damn wall…Fall…Fall so that I can see him again.

Juliane Beilschmidt had a little bruder now. His name was Mathis. He resembled Ludwig so much.

"All he does is sleep and cry," a six year old Juliane told you one day as you looked after the pair.

"Well, he is a baby, Juliane," you responded as you rocked Mathis, "That's kind of their job at the moment."

"Hey, ____?" Juliane started, "How come you don't have a baby?"

You froze for just a second before smiling at her inquisitive eyes.

"Well, you know about Onkel Gilbert, right?" you said.

"You see," you continued when Juliane nodded, "…He and I promised to marry each other when he came back…So, I'm waiting for him."

"But aren't you old, ____?"

"Hey, I'm only thirty five!"

"But I've heard the ladies in town talking about you," she insisted, "They said that you're never going to have a family if you wait for Onkel…"

Juliane went back to playing with her dolls while Mathis started to cry. As you rocked the child and hummed a lullaby to him, you realized that you may never be able to do this with your own children…

But Gilbert said he would come…So you would wait…

******

1980…

As he had promised, he came back…Along with his wife and young son.

"Lovino!" you cried, enveloping the Italian in a bone crushing hug when he arrived at your doorstep.

"I see that you missed me, ____!" Lovino said once you let go of him.

Feliciana, who was visiting you, entered the room when she heard the commotion, with four year old Mathis and ten year old Juliane behind her. When she saw Lovino at the door, she screamed with joy and tackled him.

"Fratello!" she said, crying against the man's chest.

"I missed you too, you silly girl," Lovino chuckled, hugging her back.

After Feliciana let go, the two of you were introduced to Lovino's wife, a girl from Spain named Isabel, and his six year old son, Dante. As you all caught up, you were surprised by how quickly Juliane and Mathis took to Lovino, considering they were meeting him for the first time. Lovino stated that he would be staying for a couple months before heading back to Italy, where he owned a highly successful restaurant.

Ludwig came over a while later, while Juliane and Mathis played with Dante. Lovino glared at him for a minute before shaking hands with him and "playfully" threatening to skin his muscles off if he found out he had hurt Feliciana.

Lovino knew better than to bring up the missing member of your group…You were glad about this.

Not that you had given up on him…No, that wall couldn't last forever…It was far greater than the others, with watchtowers, minefields, electric fences and the works.

But it couldn't last forever…

******

On April 16th, 1987, your mother passed away…

You cried harder for her than you had for your father. But, just like with him, you couldn't forgive her. Days later, you found a note under her pillow. It was to you.

The note mentioned the combination to a small safe in your parents' room that only they had the combination to. It said that the black box on the top shelf was all yours.

The note ended with an apology.

You opened the safe and took out the black box. You opened it and, the second you saw what was inside, you cried…

It was a little chipped and not as shiny as it once was…But that small ship shaped charm was just as you remembered it.

******

It was the evening of November 9th, 1989, and you were running as fast as you could towards the Wall.

You had been over at Ludwig and Feliciana's house for dinner, as usual since you were all alone in your house now.

Juliane and Mathis, now nineteen and thirteen respectively, came bursting into the room, saying how there was an announcement on the television that the border between East and West Berlin was open.

While Ludwig and Feliciana stared at the television in shock, you had raced out of the house and headed for the Berlin Wall.

You couldn't run as well as you used to. You were forty eight years old now. Your hair was graying and there were wrinkles forming on your face. You were nothing like the woman he had said goodbye to twenty eight years ago…

…But your feelings had not changed.

You gasped for air as you joined the crowd around the Wall. You placed a hand over your precious necklace as you observed the scene before you. It was true! There were people going through the checkpoint!

People were breaking the Wall apart with hammers and chisels. There were folks dancing and laughing, hugging and kissing. Families that had been ripped apart were together. Lovers were reunited. Friends greeted each other warmly.

"____!!"

Ludwig and Feliciana arrived, followed by their kids. You decided to split up in order to locate Gilbert, since the crowd was so thick.

"Gilbert…" you whispered, trying to push through the crowd, "Where are you?"

It shouldn't be too hard to find him. That mop of white hair and those bright red eyes were unmistakable. Plus, that loud mouth of his would give him away.

As you searched and searched, you spotted an old man whom you recognized as one of your father's friends…

The one Gilbert had been staying with!

You made your way over to him and caught him by the shoulders.

"Herr Krause!" you exclaimed, "Herr Krause, it's me! It's ____!"

"Let go, please," Herr Krause said, "I have to find ____."

You realized the man was blind.

"Herr Krause, I am _____! I really am!"

"I must find ____."

Apparently he was senile as well…

"Okay," you said, deciding to play along to get information out of him, "Why do you need to find ____? Is it about Gilbert?"

"Of course it's about that Beilschmidt boy!" he said angrily, "I must find her! That girl he kept going on and on about! Driving me insane…"

You smiled at that. So, Gilbert talked about you a lot, did he? Typical…You saw Ludwig and Feliciana meeting up with the kids just a few feet away from you. You beckoned them over and explained what was going on.

"Herr Krause," Ludwig said, "Please tell us what's going on…"

"Is Gilbert still stuck in East Berlin?" Feliciana asked.

"Of course he's stuck there!" Herr Krause yelled.

You looked at each other with broad smiles. So that meant…

"He's stuck there," Herr Krause continued, "I told them to take him back here…That his heart was in West Berlin……But they wouldn't listen to me."

An air of tension suddenly appeared. "They"????

"H-h-herr Krause," you whispered, "What happened to Gilbert?"

"Move!" he said, "I need to find ____!"

"Tell me what happened!!!!" you yelled, shocking him and every Berliner within earshot.

And so he told you…

He told you how from the second he showed up, Gilbert worked hard…Harder than anyone he'd ever seen. How Gilbert would do double, sometimes triple, shifts at the factory, even though he didn't get paid much.

How he would never shut up about his love back home, whom he had promised to take to America one day. Only after he married her though.

He talked about how Gilbert had convinced a woman to deliver a letter and toy ship to his beloved ____. How happy Gilbert was when he received cookies and a letter from a border guard, saying they were from ____.

He told you about how the more Gilbert looked at the Wall, the more unhappy and desperate he seemed to become. How he saw people escape over that barrier. How he saw others die.

Then, one day in October of 1963, Herr Krause said how something snapped in Gilbert.

There were no guards paying attention and they were close to the Wall…So, so close.

Without warning, Gilbert started to climb up the Wall, much to Herr Krause's shock. Gilbert had scraped his arm, causing him to let out an involuntary hiss of pain. This alerted the guards to him…

As Gilbert reached the top, he called someone's name. Some Bach fellow…

The man, who turned out to be a guard, climbed up and tried to pull him over. Then, the shot rang out. Gilbert had fallen back in East Berlin and the guard was definitely dead.

As the border guards trained their guns on him and prepared to kill him, Gilbert let out a declaration of love and an apology.

Then, the guards fired…

You all stared in mind-numbing horror at Herr Krause's story.

"They buried him in one of the old fields," he said, "They never told me where and I couldn't find it."

You fell to your knees, clutching your beloved necklace, becoming dead to the world. Was someone crying? You thought you heard a scream…And why was it raining? There were no clouds in the sky…

You realized why "Gilbert" had warned you about the Wall…

…………Once upon a time, you had heard someone say, "That which divides us will only make us stronger." Such a lovely belief…A testament to the strength of the human spirit….

……………………Lies………………